To Card or Not to Card

Christmas Card

Did your mother track who sent her Christmas cards each year? Memories came flooding back when we found my mom's holiday card notebook among her papers back in 2005.  Like a date book, notebook was a 5" x 8" ringed faux leather binder with alphabetized sections to which she added or removed pages.  It was something proper wives did 40 years ago when I remember as a young bride.

There were pages of names and addresses with columns of yearly send/received check boxes. If the check box was not marked on the received column of one year, Mom was likely to draw a line through the name and not send a card the next year. If a card did come with a new address on it, then she'd update the address, add the check mark and send out a card belatedly, restoring that person's notebook status.  All kind of Martha Steward like, very tidy and organized. She tried instructing me to do the same, but I didn't get it. It looked like some kind of scoring system to keep everything even. For me, the point of sending out cards is not to "exchange" cards, but for us to send our holiday cheer to let people know we haven't forgotten them, that we remember them fondly, whether or not people send cheer back.

Over the years, I've sent cards hand signed with hand written names and addresses on the envelopes. Sometimes I enclosed a letter or silly poem.  There were a few fancy years when embossed signatures and address printed envelopes the rage. Eventually, with the aid of online programs, I graduated to creating my own cards using digital photos.   Some years we'd send almost two hundred cards and in other years only a few dozen.  When it felt like a race to meet "the deadline," I changed to "after Christmas" New Year's cards,  but at least, I was sending out cards -- physical paper cards -- because I just don't believe that electronic cards, despite the music and animation are the same.  You can hang real cards on ribbons to make "memory" decorations, then sit by the tree late at night, reading through them, remembering good times, while sipping a warming dram of scotch.

For the past two years, time pressures and "s**t happens" life made sending cards a burden rather than the gift of cheer it should be. I just gave up, not sending cards at all. But I felt really, really guilty about it.  And, there's nothing like guilt to spring me into action. How dare I abandon this holiday tradition?  I know many people don't send cards anymore, but every time I do receive a real card, even from someone I haven't heard from in many years, I smile, I sigh and think good thoughts.  It was truly a gift.  What could be better at Christmas time?

I've come back from the disengaged abyss! When we received our first card last night, from a friend who takes great joy in being the first to send holiday greetings, I know I've made the right decision.  His card made me smile.  With this card, I am starting my ribbon memory decoration.

Once again, like doing the Christmas tree after so long of not having one, I'm bringing tradition back into our lives, taking the time to sign each card, address the envelope and add the stamp. Now, if I can just find all my old address lists.  Let the hunt begin!